I just finished a super intense 10-day silent meditation retreat with my wife, Carrie.

And over those 10 days, I realized something important:

I really don’t like being in isolation — especially for days on end — with no phone, no friends, and barely any food.

It’s very uncomfortable for a guy like me.

In fact, if I were to design a party for myself, it would be the exact opposite of this: lots of people, lots of food.

But Carrie’s done several of these retreats, and she loves them…

So when the opportunity came, I decided to join her (fully anticipating an uncomfortable experience).

Because in spite of the pain, I wanted to better understand her experience.

And I don’t regret it at all…

Because from my discomfort, two wonderful things happened:

  • First, I was able to connect with Carrie on a deeper level than I ever have before…
  • And second, something about the isolation pushed me to access a totally different kind of creativity than when I’m in my normal routine.

That’s where the poem comes in.

After 6 or 7 days of silence, sitting in my little room, eating my bowl of grool, I wrote something. And I really want to share with you.

You can watch the video above to listen to me read it, or check it out for yourself:

I always wanted to be me,
I see no improvements to be made,
I am absolutely perfect,
Just the way I came,
Growing, learning, changing,
It’s all a part of the game,

I always wanted to be me,
That includes my curiosity,
Trying this, trying that,
Going there and coming back,

I want the pleasure and the pain,
I want the whole entire range,
Of experience to be had,
There’s no such thing as good and bad,
They are judgements that I make,
Points of view I can take,
The choice is always mine,

If I happen to forget,
It is me who pays the fine,

The secret to being free,
Is always to find me,
Right as I am,
A man

I always wanted to be me,
That includes constant change,
The sum of all my parts,
With an added dose of strange,

I created me,
And my identity,
I created you,
And the world in which we live,
My responsibility is all I have to give,

I offer you yourself,
For there is nothing more,
I am selling people themselves,
From door to door

I always wanted you to be you,
Together what beautiful things we can do,
Power is there for the taking,
Power comes from us making,
The choice that we are right,
In the darkness and the light,

We can have as much as we’re willing,
We can have as much as we want,
Enthusiasm and attitude,
Dictate the Universe’s response,

They will try to fix you,
“You’re wrong!” Is what they sell,
Then it’s “Come over here little girl,
For a dollar we can get you well”,

They’ll tell you that you’re lacking,
For that’s their only pitch,
What they’re selling is a scratch,
For an invisible itch,

The truth is that you’re perfect,
You have all it takes,
Add a little love,
To put icing on the cake

I can expect to out,
Only what I’m willing to invest,
What I’ve been searching for,
Is in the center of my chest.

1:13 Being alone for days on end is uncomfortable for Ezra
2:22 When you remove the routine and stimulation of daily life and don’t replace it with anything, you are confronted with yourself
3:40 There was a type of creative energy that was only reached in that spot
4:24 Ezra reads his poem

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